The feminine essence refers to the femininity that we naturally hold as women.

It is something that exists naturally, as a part of our design as women. This means that it’s not something that we need to ‘get’ or ‘become’ through striving, forcing and trying to be who we are not. It doesn’t require you to look a certain way, or do stereotypically ‘feminine’ things.

Yet while this femininity is inherent, a woman is usually taught to diminish it- at least in its organic state. In a world where the masculine energy is celebrated and seen as “the way,” the feminine energy is pushed down and seen as something less than, which makes women less inclined to believe in and trust their feminine nature.

Yet what many women are finding, is that overriding their feminine essence leads to exhaustion, disconnect and a lack of fulfilment, worthiness and joy.

What I have personally observed in my work with women, is that even the most seemingly hardened woman, has a feminine core that she is longing to connect with. A deep part of her that desires to soften, rest, and be loved and supported for who she is, without needing to perform, strive or achieve.

This is abundantly reflected in my clients and the women who connect with my work, where many of them, from the outside, or from the type of job they have, would not at all seem like they would be interested in restoring their femininity- yet there is still this intrinsic desire to recover this vital core of their being.

Through observation and personal connection with clients and women in my life, I notice that a woman becomes more interested in restoring her femininity when she begins to unravel and heal from conditioning that has veered her away from her naturalness and heart.

Prior to this, there is often a deeply-rooted rejection of the feminine, leading to feelings of derision around the notion of femininity. There is often a sense of feeling as though femininity is antiquated, or weak, or frivolous, or something that should be ‘overcome’.

Yet when I reflect on the qualities of femininity, I feel a deep sorrow around the way we as women have been taught to demean, distort and diminish these qualities- in ourselves and in the world.

I myself feel a deep sense of grief for the times I spent thinking that I had to hide my softer nature. For thinking that I had to perform, prove, achieve, intellectualise, defend and strive. For not understanding the natural healing and beauty that existed within my feminine being. For feeling afraid to stand in the truth of my feminine gifts, sensitivities and emotions. For thinking that I had to figure it all out, that I wasn’t allowed to rest in God.

I perceive femininity not through the lens of a rigid role that a woman has to play, but rather, through questioning what actually fulfils a feminine-essenced woman. What actually allows her to live a healed, whole life, where she feels deeply connected, supported and loved?

When I perceive the qualities of femininity, I see freedom, relief and a return to the inner richness of the heart - something that is not based on external manifestations, but on an interior state of being. A softening that can exist within a broad range of external expressions, roles and personalities, yet still holds the same deeper frequency of naturalness, tenderness and heart.

While the feminine of course encompasses a deep range of octaves and expression, there are 4 frequencies, or feminine essence qualities, that have a particularly deep and naturally healing impact on a woman’s soul when she feels safe to embody them.

These four life-giving qualities of the feminine essence include;

1. tenderness

Tenderness is the state of seeing through the heart. The desire to acknowledge and value the heart of a human, beyond what they achieve, produce or give. It is based on agenda-less connection, a heart that feels free to love, and a deep longing to care, nurture and naturally serve. It is not a forced state, but a state that organically arises when the heart is healed and a woman feels protected, loved and worthy in who she is.

2. radiance

Radiance is a gift of the feminine, and a woman’s natural state when she feels loved, supported and free to be who she naturally is. Where she lives from grace, openness and her intrinsic value in God, instead of cycling in conditioned beliefs that see her striving, proving and convincing others of who she is.

Radiance is the lightness of heart that a woman brings to the world, where she magnetises and attracts, rather than forces, pushes and chases. It is a naturally healing state, that has a profound effect (both seen and unseen) not only on her as an individual woman, but on everyone she is in relationship with.

3. sensitivity

There is an inherent sensitivity that exists in women- a depth of feeling that is intrinsic, even if it isn’t externally expressed. A sensibility (both biological and spiritual) that attunes a woman to the deeper octaves of life, and allows her to traverse the unspoken and the unseen. It is the gentle cadence that sits beyond what is known and draws in a deeper layer of being that has reverence for what is viscerally felt and experienced.

When this sensitivity is distorted or diminished, it leads to volatility, repression or numbing. Yet when a woman understands and can harness her sensitivity, it is life enhancing and nourishing. A state of empowered vulnerability, where she is connected to the senses she was naturally given, and can use them to bring deeper compassion, understanding and insight to life.

4. softness

Softness is the de-armoured state where a woman is rested and unencumbered in her being. It is gentleness, and the slow bloom of natural being. When a woman embodies her softness, she no longer wants to walk around with the shields she has been taught to energetically carry. They feel heavy and constraining, not protective.

She begins to observe the hardness of the world with tenderness (and oftentimes grief) yet knowing that it is not necessary for her to perpetuate this. Instead, she drops her defences and embodies the tender power of her femininity, trusting in her inner value and consenting only to the goodness, beauty and truth of God.

Belinda 💓

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If you’re seeking to trust in and honour the qualities and essence of your feminine nature, learn more here.